So many books, so little time

I probably shouldn't be working on my "just for fun" book, but...

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Tue, 13 May 2008 20:44:39 GMT

I like books about writing and editing. But one I've really been intrigued by isn't a book at all, but a workshop called the Novel Revision Retreat held by Darcy Pattison. But now I guess it really is a book (although I wonder if it would be as helpful as a retreat). I just got the book and am starting it to revise a book that isn't under contract at all, in little corners of time. I'm hoping it will give the book a little extra "oopmph!"

Has anyone else used the book or gone on the retreat? What did you think?

More about Memoirs

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Tue, 13 May 2008 13:45:46 GMT

Despite all the recent fuss, memoirs still top the best-seller list. Here's an article in Christian Science Monitor about memoirs, and it even quotes Powell’s Michael Drannen, someone I actually know!

The universe makes a joke

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Mon, 12 May 2008 20:49:54 GMT

So, one of the many reasons my job had lost some of its joy was when my new supervisor, in all seriousness, told me that one of the top things I needed to work on was my handwriting. When I laughed and said I must be doing a pretty good job then, she got very defensive, and told me neat handwriting was essential, even though 99% of our work was done on computers. I started typing up my time sheet.

Now I'm working through an editor's comments on a manuscript. The editor has one of those half print, half cursive styles. And I am staring at a word followed by a question mark that's scribbled in the margin.

It could be:
seen?
sense?
soon?
sewn?

or something completely different. It could start with a j or have an l in it.

I have no idea.

Do not submit again to the yoke of slavery

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Mon, 12 May 2008 19:04:24 GMT

On Friday, I was filled with joy that I have my life back, and have for three months (since I quit my job). I do what I choose to do, eat when I want to, wear what I want to, and don't attend meetings where I look around the table and wonder if everyone else thinks it's BS too. I haven't put on nylons or listened to traffic updates in 13 weeks.

On Saturday, I saw an old co-worker. More reshuffling, more buzzwords (everyone's getting a "playbook" for the "brand revitalization"), more speculation about who will be the next to be forced out. In my last year at my job, of about 22 people in my department, 13 or so left (some not under their own power).

So even when I sat down with our bills on Sunday and started fretted (am I crazy for trying to make a living off my writing? I mean, I'm okay today, but what about tomorrow? What about kid starts college in five years? What about our retirement?) I thought - this is still better. Sufficient to each day, and all that. And right now I've got lots of good writing to do, and I'm excited about it.

Love You Forever/Hate You Forever

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Mon, 12 May 2008 14:05:36 GMT

Okay, I’ll admit I’m in the camp that actually likes Robert Munch’s I Love You Forever.

How do you feel about it? I don’t much like the drawings (nor does my kid) but something about the book always made me get choked up in the end. And I guess, from reading this that means I am a total loser.

How to count

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Sun, 11 May 2008 15:20:22 GMT

How many books you write and how many books you publish are often not the same thing. Case in point: me.

1. Empty Spaces. 1992. First, very autobiographical novel about a woman who works at a hospital. One agent called talked to me about it for an hour, but thought it should be completely changed.

2. Family Values. 1994. Four first-person voices about a woman coming to terms with her family and her past. Got me my agent and a lot of nice rejection letters.

3. Keeping Track. 1995? About the Orphan Trains. Not even nice rejection letters.

4. Circles of Confusion. 1997 (sold)/1999 published. Sold in three days as a mystery (which wasn't how I had been thinking of it). A woman inherits a painting that may be a long-lost Vermeer.

5. Square in the Face. 1997/2000. Sold as part of a package deal with above. Same woman tries to find a child’s adopted sibling for a bone-marrow match.

6. Heart-Shaped Box. 1999/2001. Third book in series, set at a high school reunion where the first person who dies is the former head cheerleader. While I was on tour for this book, I learned the publisher was dropping the series because the second book had not sold twice as many hardcover copies as the first (an expectation I was unaware of, which was probably just as well)

7. Learning to Fly. 2002/2003. Written on spec, a thriller about a woman who survives a multiple car crash and ends up with a bag of money. This book did very well – esp. in France. If it sold proportionately in America what it did in France, I would be a rich woman.

8. Buried Diamonds. 2003?/2004. Fourth in the series. Miraculously, my agent was able to shift the series over to another house. Woman finds a long-lost diamond ring and learns her elderly neighbors have many secrets.

9. Satellite. 2003? What happens when a man who thinks he’s dying finds out he isn’t. What my agent termed a “tweener,” meaning it didn’t fit into any category. Editors liked it for the most part, but ended up passing after saying they didn’t know how to market it.

10. Shock Point. 2004/2006. YA thriller about overseas teen boot camps.

11. Some Assembly Required. 2004. Chick lit in a very cold market. Didn’t sell.

12. Torched. 2006/2009. YA thriller about teen who goes undercover with a group like ELF.

13. Face of Betrayal. 2008/2009. First in a 4-book series (with Lis Wiehl) about three friends who solve crimes.

So 13 books, including four that haven’t seen the light of day. Plus three still to be written. I’m just glad the number that has been published is more than the number that hasn’t.

What can you learn from this?
- Keep writing. While writing Family Values, I took a class and joined a critique group. Several people who were better writers than I was gave up after a couple of rejections from agents. I persevered and got published. Tenacity is just as important as talent.
- Even after you’re published, there are no guarantees. Either way. Your career can always rebound, a book can always tank. The secret is to keep trying. And enjoy what you’re doing.

Well, THAT was awkward

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Sat, 10 May 2008 22:10:32 GMT

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The spouse, the kid and I ended up at a Marty Wilson Piper concert on Friday, when spouse’s friend wasn’t well enough to come with spouse. Wilson Piper’s the guitar player for an Australian band called The Church, but this tour was about his own music. The show was at the Aladdin Theatre [full disclosure: when I first moved to Portland, it was in the midst of it’s umpteenth year of showing nothing but Deep Throat.] It seats 400-500.

There were maybe 50 people in the audience. And they clamored for Church songs that required a full orchestra. Meanwhile, he’s up there with just three young ladies, only one of whom could really play a guitar with mastery.

He joked that he would get to know all of her names by the end of the night. He also plaintively asked what else was happening last night in Portland. They were uncertain of what date it was (it appears to be a grueling tour), and when informed it was Friday, they were even more chagrined.

We compensated by clapping loudly.

Read more about The Church <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Church”</a>, and listen to a clip of their biggest hit, Under the Milky Way. I also like his song “Lullaby for the Lonesome.”

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Why I love Portland/Oregon

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Sat, 10 May 2008 16:54:26 GMT

1. Because I voted at home on Thursday night, with easy access to my voters' pamphlet and the Internet if I had questions. Vote by mail rocks! (And those people who said it wouldn't work in Florida to figure out how to seat the delegates there were wrong - it works very well here.)

2. 90 minutes to the coast, 90 minutes to the mountains.

3. Physician-assisted suicide. Another thing the pundits said wouldn't work. Many more people get the prescription than use it - but if I were dying and in pain, I would like the option.

4. Bands that call Portland home (or at least most members do): Death Cab for Cutie, the Shins, the Decemberists, and Modest Mouse.

5. Powells.

6. Really great restaurants.

7. If you like to bike, this is a good place for it. [Full disclosure: I'm too chicken, because of very vivid and decades-old memories involving my first bike ride in five years, a steep hill, a new bike, and a car that came out of nowhere. I shredded my clothes, a great deal of skin, and any sense of dignity.]

8. A robust library system [at least in Multnomah County.]

9. A commitment to being green, buying local, and eating fresh.

[Full disclosure: who was that in the back that said something about overcast skies and rain? I can't hear you! I'm putting my fingers in my ears right now!]

Fifty ways to make yourself write

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Fri, 09 May 2008 19:01:39 GMT

Are you looking for ways to make yourself write?

Well, here are 50! Many of them are excellent. I'm going to do the CD one right now.

The strangest spam

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Fri, 09 May 2008 13:50:27 GMT

I just got the strangest unsolicited email. There’s no way to opt out of it – I’m not sure where the author found my email address. I’m on a bunch of lists, so I assume he went fishing.

It’s a solicitation to check out a book. It’s clearly self-published, bearing one of the worst clip art covers I’ve ever seen.

And try to fit all these pieces together and come up with a coherent thought about the book:
- At the top of the email it says, “What is reality? Who is God? How do we get God to save us?
- On the book’s cover it says it’s a “spy novel”
- The clip art is of palm trees
- When you click through annoying Jamaican music begins to play in an endless loop and you can read the first few pages.
- And the first few pages are about a woman who meets a hot guy at a resort. “The island breeze blew through her mind chasing away cares like wispy clouds across an azure sky.”

But then when I tried to read about the author, it seems like he’s published some well-respected books, albeit twenty years ago. But in this solicitation, the pieces don’t fit together into any kind of whole. A spy novel about the nature of God and reality and Jamaica and pick-ups?

How "real" are Dove's Real Beauty ads?

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Thu, 08 May 2008 20:06:00 GMT

Ad Age says, "Dove's "real beauties" may not be so real after all, at least by the account of a renowned airbrush artist." Read more here.

I'm not that surprised, given this rather tone deaf episode where sometime tried to "enlist" me to support Dove.

Show Don’t Tell – My Personal Achilles Heel

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Thu, 08 May 2008 14:32:05 GMT

I have published six books, with two more out due next spring, and am contracted for three more past that.

So you would think I knew how to avoid “telling, not showing.”

You would be wrong.

Take this sentence in a manuscript I’m revising: “My reading buddy, Melissa, started jumping up and down and screaming about how she hated the fifth-grade boys.”

Is that telling or showing?

I decided it was telling, because it was summarizing. It wasn’t specific. It felt past-tensey, like I was describing an event that had already happened, rather than one that was happening now. (Even though the book is written in past tense, it should still feel immediate.)

So I changed it to: “A scream cut through the noise. It was Melissa. Her face was red, and her hands were clenched into fists. She started jumping up and down. And with each breath, she screamed just one word. “I. Hate. Boys. It’s. All. Your. Fault.”

Showing lets readers draw their own conclusions. You could say “The man was ugly,” or you could describe him in detail without every using the word ugly (or angry, or beautiful, or intelligent) and let readers draw their own conclusion.

Of course, you can’t dramatize everything. Sometimes it’s fine to summarize to move the story along or if the point isn’t important.

One trick I’ve read about is to study movies – which of course can’t tell you anything (except perhaps in voice over). They have to show it.

Do you have a favorite trick to help you show, not tell?

Maybe there is hope for me after all?

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Wed, 07 May 2008 22:33:22 GMT

This headline on Yahoo caught my eye: "Big bottom may help protect against diabetes, researchers say."

When is a hardcover not a real book? When it's an ARC

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Wed, 07 May 2008 19:53:28 GMT

Advanced reader copies, or ARCs, are sent to reviewers and producers in the hope of producing reviews and options. They come in a number of different flavors. Some have plain paper covers colored red or blue or pink, with words printed on them. Some have plain covers, but the first page in shows the cover art (I've never seen the point of that, esp. if the cover art is good enough to be a selling point - why hide it?). I've even seen ARCs for paperbacks, which seems kind of silly to me.

Well, now Touchstone is planning on doing some hardcover ARCs. (Most ARCs are more like trade paperbacks.) PW says, "Touchstone/Fireside is rolling out hardcover advance copies of its August 2008 novel, What Happened to Anna K, in an effort to gain attention for the title from booksellers and the press."

According to Touchstone/Fireside executive v-p and publisher Mark Gompertz, the move was "not inexpensive" and

The hardcover is supposed to be enough of a gimmick that it gets folks to read it. And maybe it works, because the publisher told PW it's had a "tremendous" response. My guess it's not the hardcover, per se, just the knowledge that if the company is forking over the money, they expect this to be a big book.

I guess the new hardcovers lack a bar code and are labelled as an ARC. I wonder if collectors (who are kind of a crazy bunch) will consider them more or less collectible.

100 years ago, did a female serial killer escape detection?

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Wed, 07 May 2008 13:44:07 GMT

Usually, female serial killers have a male accomplice. But rarely, there is a female serial killer who works by herself. Male serial killers are usually sexually motivated and seek power over their victims. Their victims are often people society won't miss. Female serial killers usually kill for profit.

Now investigators are trying to solve the twisted tale of a woman who was known as Lady Bluebeard. How many people did she kill? And did she fake her own death? Her husbands and children seemed to have a habit of turning up dead, another difference between male and female serial killers. Male serial killers usually don’t know their victims.

Read more here.

[Full disclosure: I've written probably 10 or 11 mysteries and thrillers, but never with a serial killer, because I just don't want to spend 6-10 months in that person's head.]

Would you pay $27 to see James Frey?

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Tue, 06 May 2008 18:34:36 GMT

Powells is gambling that some people will. They do some specialty events at The Bagdad Theatre, and this is one of them. The cost is not as bad as it sounds, since it includes a copy of his new novel, Bright Shiny Morning. You also get to hear Josh Kilmer-Purcell read from Candy Everybody Wants, which I guess is a book about celebrity. [How appropriate!] I'm still not sure I would want to be teamed with him, but I'm assuming he got to make the call.

A book the helped one girl when she needed it the most

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Tue, 06 May 2008 14:04:29 GMT

In Seattle, a girl’s encounter with a book changed her life. After reading Sharon Draper’s Forged by Fire, she was inspired to speak up about her own abuse by a former PE teacher. He had molested the girls in her family. “They had told only one another about McGee's assaults; one later told authorities that she had told her mother, but nothing was done, and that she figured no adult would believe her.” Then she read Draper’s book.

Read more here.

Sometimes good things really do happen to good people (and good writers)

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Mon, 05 May 2008 19:20:59 GMT

I remember back in July being excited about seeing this in Publishers Deal Lunch:

How Evan Broke His Head and Other Secrets author Garth Stein's THE ART OF RACING IN THE RAIN, a heart-wrenching but also humorous and uplifting story of the family dog's efforts to hold together a young family in the face of illness, death, and a divisive custody battle, to Jennifer Barth at Harper, at auction, for publication in June 2008, by Jeff Kleinman at Folio Literary Management. Foreign rights are handled by Anna Stein; film rights are with Howard Sanders at UTA.

I loved How Evan Broke His Head. And this was the first “adult” book my kid ever read (we were in Europe with a dearth of books in English, and I had just finished it, so I knew there wasn’t too much I that would be bad for an 11 yo who read above grade level.

So now Garth has hit the daily double: The Art of Racing in the Rain is the top Booksense Pick for June (perhaps you've heard of another top pick, a little book called Water for Elephants) AND his book has been picked to be featured in Starbucks.

Maybe I should write something about dogs! Only, I must confess, I have never owned one. And my husband's allergy issues are so bad that isn't gong to change. [Full disclosure: I hope my dogless state does not make you think less of me.]

Is this anyway to make money?

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Mon, 05 May 2008 13:53:27 GMT

It sounds like there’s a team of folks who are calling LA-area bookstores and claiming to be authors who will soon have or who have recently had a signing – and now they are in a spot of trouble. Their car’s been towed, or stolen. They need $150 or $200 wired to them right away through Western Union.

They’re not shy about claiming to be someone famous, as well as unknown. Callers have claimed to be Ray Bradbury, Russell Banks, and Nick Hornby (down to the English accent).

“Berman speculated that this gang has several members -- one black man, one English guy, one woman -- to make impersonation easier. "It's like the Mod Squad or something."”

This seems like a lot of effort for not a lot of money. Maybe it’s the thrill of it all?

Read more here.

Young at Heart

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Sun, 04 May 2008 14:41:40 GMT

I Heart this movie! It’s about a group of singers, average age 80, who perform songs by Cold Play the Clash, and other groups you would not expect. It’s a far cry from some of individual members earlier gigs which included groups like the Golden Age Harmonicats and the Chicopee Singing Swinging Seniors.

Originally a BBC documentary, Young at Heart is now airing in theatres – perhaps one near you. It’s funny, sad, unexpected, moving when you worry it might just be sappy.

Read more about the Young@Heart Chorus here.

And may I just say that while the director of the Young&Heart Chorus, Bob Cilman, is married, should things ever change for the both of us, well….

Scraps of paper

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Sat, 03 May 2008 14:46:12 GMT

Every time I start a new book, I go through an entire file drawer that I have filled with nothing but scraps of paper. Magazine articles about hoarding, or shoplifting, or addictions to QVC. Bits of newspaper desccribing bits of lives. Some might spark characters, others plot twists. Like I just read a tidbit about a gang in the 50s that once killed a man and then cut off his hands and then kept them in the freezer - with the plan of using them to put fingerprints on another murder weapon.

Here's something from the NY Times Metropolitan Diary section earlier this year. Doesn't this just conjure up an entire character? In fact, you could almost start a plot with this story. What happens next to Drew? Does his shell continue to crack more and more?

========
Dear Diary:

I live in Brooklyn but work in Manhattan and sometimes take the train to Carroll Gardens. I am a 50-year-old male, very unassuming and very low-key.

When I boarded the train recently, the row of seats in front of me and the row beside me were filled with young men and women, probably in their late teens or early 20s. They were loud and raucous, yelling and laughing at the top of their lungs. I wondered whether they were going to give me a headache or hassle me.

Suddenly, the guy next to me introduced himself, extended his hand and explained that they were playing the staring game (whoever blinked first lost). After I introduced myself, he asked if I would like to be the next contestant to challenge the reigning champ. At first I was hesitant but then obliged.

My opponent across the aisle was a lovely young woman who hunkered down and gave me her best stare. I gave it my best for the next few minutes, being cheered on by some of the group, but in the end I blinked and lost. For the rest of my ride I watched subsequent matches until I got to Brooklyn. Upon leaving, all in the group wished me a good night and a happy holiday.

It was the best time I had riding the train in years.

Drew Helstosky
=====

So does anyone else have a similar file drawer?

How can someone so present be absent?

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Fri, 02 May 2008 23:07:46 GMT

Do you remember that book, The Brief History of the Dead, that had the gorgeous cover?

In the book, if you die, you go to a second place, where you stay until everyone on Earth who remembers you, even a little bit, dies.

I felt like that today. I ran into an old acquaintance, someone I've known for 15 years. I haven't seen him for three or four years, ever since he and his wife switched gyms.

We were delighted to run into each other at the post office. We started by talking about the gym, and he said what a great place it was for kids. He and his wife married late, and she got pregnant in her early 40s, to their surprise and joy. But then at five months, something went wrong.

So today I thought he was saying the gym was a great place for _their_ kids. I said, "Oh, that's great, so you and Mary have kids now?" Adoption, I was thinking, although I knew she had also wanted to try again.

His eyes opened wide. "April," he said, "Mary's dead. She's been dead for a year and a half."

Brain cancer. They celebrated their seventh wedding anniversary in a hospital, their eighth with her in a hospital bed at home in hospice.

Mary had waist-length strawberry blond hair, freckles, a smile that made you smile, too. How can she be dead when she has been alive all this time in my memory?

I now have a back-up career

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Fri, 02 May 2008 17:56:35 GMT

In case being a writer doesn't work out, the mammography technician informed me today that I have "perfect breasts" - for being a mammogram model. Yes, spending all day having a tender part of you painfully compressed by strangers who really don't know what they are doing - maybe it's not so different from being a writer. Although I would get to give the strangers feedback and correct them, at least in the mammogram model.

Left Behind by Bush’s Policies?

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Fri, 02 May 2008 13:57:29 GMT

If No Child Left Behind is so great, then how come so many teachers hate it?

Teacher turned author Jordan Sonnenblick wrote about it for School Library Journal. You can read it here.

And the Oregon science teacher who was just named National Teacher of the Year and got to meet Bush took the opportunity to tell the president that No Child Left Behind is censoring creative teachers like himself because of its heavy reliance on tests.

Read more about his effort to speak truth to power here.

Are you a teacher? What do you think of No Child Left Behind?

I really AM special

aprilhenrymysteries@yahoo.com — Thu, 01 May 2008 19:31:38 GMT

I got this letter recently:

"It is my pleasure to inform you that you are being considered for inclusion into the 2007/2008 Cambridge Who's Who Among Executive and Professional Women "Honors Edition" of the Registry."

The title was in both bold and italics, and "honors edition" just in italics, but with quote marks around it. What's with the quote marks? Are they mocking themselves?

And I'm only being considered for inclusion! So it's not a sure thing, but at least they're thinking of me, and that's so exciting! And for the "honors edition" no less, not just that regular edition that anyone can be in.

"The 2007/2008 edition of the Registry will include biographies of our country's most accomplished women. Recognition of this kind is an honor shared by thousands of executive and professional women throughout America each year."

[Wait a minute. Thousands? So if I'm only being considered, how big is the pool? Like does it include all women?]

"Inclusion is considered by many as the single highest mark of achievement."

[I'm sure that's true. Why, being in some trumped-up registry beats the pants off the NY Times Bestseller list!]

"For accuracy and publication deadlines please return to us your application form within five business days from receipt of this letter. There is no cost to be included."

[Of course, there's no cost, right? This couldn't be a scam, could it?]

"On behalf of the Managing Director, we wish you continued success.

Sincerely,

Jennifer A. Gonzalez
Editor in Chief

Cambridge Who's Who is proudly not associated or affiliated with any other Who's Who Publication or Organization"

[You read that right. Proudly NOT associated! ]

On their Web site you discover that there are many "optional" benefits:
"COMMEMORATIVE CERTIFICATE OF RECOGNITION and WALL PLAQUE
All members of Cambridge Who’s Who automatically receive an official Certificate of Recognition to identify them as active and participating members of this elite community. This elegant, personalized document is specially designed for maximum impact and features the prestigious Cambridge seal of authenticity. These certificates can be beautifully matted and framed to enhance your décor while also commemorating this important highlight in a member’s career. Our membership is proud to prominently display this distinguished document in either their homes or offices.

“An optional benefit for members is the Cambridge Who’s Who wall plaque. Our wall plaques are crafted of the finest materials and are personalized with laser engraving as a personal tribute to honor our members’ success. The wall plaque is a tasteful way to further validate one’s status within a profession and add special emphasis to unique achievements. "”

[Wow! Nothing beats a "prestigious Cambridge seal of authenticity." I think I will put a plaque in every room!]

"Hard Cover Registry
Cambridge Who’s Who hardcover registry is an impressive and beautifully bound publication that contains the biographical profiles of thousands of accomplished individuals throughout the world who have attained levels of professionalism in their respected industries. This substantial volume is a testimony to a person’s personal and professional achievements and can be used for researching business opportunities and effortless networking. Imagine the impact of having your own personal biographical profile featured with the rest of the Cambridge Who’s Who community. This placement clearly demonstrates the level of achievement for our members and validates their varied individual accomplishments."

[Imagine! I could network with people who were stupid enough to fall for this cheesy rip-off. ]

In fact, here's one woman's experience as posted on scam.com:

"I too received the flattering letter via mail. I filled in the questionnaire (after reading that I would NOT be required to pay any money in order to be listed).. and sent my information in. I just received a phone call from one of their account representatives. She asked me a few more questions and then pleasantly announced that I had been selected to be a member of this elite group. I thanked her for the honor and she proceeded to tell me that my welcome kit and bio draft would be sent via mail. I was to edit the bio and then send in the correct version for print. Soon to follow, would be my CD member roster, online password, and hard copy registry. I would also have a link to my company on their website, receive an official letter of congratulations and a Cambridge logo for advertising/PR purposes. I was feeling really good and my head was swelling with pride. THEN - she asked which membership I wanted.. the $400+ yearly rate with an additional $150+? for something (by this point my mind was spinning)... OR did I want the lifetime membership for just $675+???"

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