I get a lot of people contacting me now. They want my help in either turning their life story into an exciting mystery series, or simply a best-selling memoir. Okay, the first one kind of makes sense and isn't all that crazy. The second one I guess stems from people thinking that writing is writing, and that they have an interesting life story. (For some reason, the life story often is about how they were screwed over and/or about their frequent lawsuits.)
And then there are people who you just can't categorize.
Like someone who sent me an email that starts like this:
"I have been left little choice but to use email spider software on multiple entertainment industry web sites, in order to get answers to my questions. During that time I pounded out another screenplay. NOW UNDERSTAND THIS! You are not the only person who gets this. And during the course of writing it, simply due to previous theft of my work, I have made it IMPOSSIBLE FOR ANY ONE TO STEAL! And that is because while I wrote it, I sent it to every studio’s legal department, every agent at William Morris, and Endeavor, every US Marshal with an email address, 3000 independent attorney’s, multiple corporations complaint departments and investor relations email addresses, every reporter at over thirty publications, including Variety, The National Enquirer, The Hollywood Reporter, The Los Angeles Times, The New York Post, and the Wall Street Journal. And in addition to them I also sent it to a laundry list of celebrities, radio personalities, and or movie stars. Some of who you may represent."
And then goes on for pages and pages, most of I guess a script.
Oooo-kaaaaay. Last I looked I was just a writer. Not an agent, or a production exec, or a reporter, US Marshall, lawyer. Maybe I am a celebrity?